Pain into Purpose: How Working with Immigrant Children Helped Me Heal from Childhood Trauma


Julia Poppell | January 28, 2025

*Trigger Warning: This story mentions instances of substance abuse, as well as physical and emotional violence.*

In September 2022, as I sat through the required onboarding training at Church World Service (CWS), I found myself uncovering pieces of my own story. I had recently joined the Home Study & Post-Release Services (HS/PRS) national team, eager to support caregivers and unaccompanied children as they navigated the complexities of their new lives in the United States. However, it was the training from the National Child Traumatic Stress Network that genuinely caught my attention since it offered an in-depth exploration of the long-term effects of trauma on children’s attachment, development, and mental health. As I delved deeper into the training material, I began to recognize fragments of my own experiences. Suddenly, the journey that had led me to this work began to take on a new, profound meaning. 

Julia (third from the left) and her team participate in a self care activity after work

Growing up, my life was a complex web of trauma, instability, and resilience. At seven, one of my parent’s substance abuse sent our lives into a downward spiral. Though our home life had its challenges and chaos before that, everything changed in a matter of months. Over the next few years, my brothers and I were shuffled between relatives and state custody. While my two brothers eventually returned to our parent’s custody and shortly thereafter were removed by Child Protective Services (CPS) and placed in foster homes, I remained in the home of other relatives, where I endured physical and emotional abuse for the next three years. Law enforcement and CPS were involved intermittently at other times throughout my childhood, which later made trusting authorities feel challenging early in my career. All in all, these experiences forged me into a guarded, defensive, and hyper-independent child, struggling to form lasting attachments or accept love. 

Though our parent eventually stopped using, and we were all able to return, our relationship has since been defined by mistrust and a feeling of a need for self-reliance. At age 14, when their relapse on their substance of choice happened, I thought about how I could run away or even legally emancipate myself. None of these were realistic options, so I called my grandmother in South Carolina, who agreed to let me live with her and my brothers and I were once again separated. The younger one and newborn stayed with our parent and endured chaos for the next four years and the oldest remained in a state-funded supportive group home to manage his cognitive disabilities. In the end, my life changed a lot as I began to navigate a loss of the life that I knew in exchange for a new family that I did not know as well, a different culture in another part of the country, and an unfamiliar way of being amidst all the challenges that accompany adolescence. 

But amidst the chaos, there were moments of solace. Later, I found refuge with an aunt and uncle who provided stability, attention, and love during my final two high school years. Their home was my first exposure to a stable, healthy family dynamic and the love and commitment that parents should show their children. My two cousins became like brothers to me, and I experienced crucial emotional growth during this time. Though this support was a lifeline, it was clear that two years could not erase 16 years of trauma and instability. The scars of my childhood continued to shape my adult life as I navigated struggles with anxiety and deep-seated feelings of never fully belonging anywhere. 

While in my aunt and uncle’s home, I was also exposed to international service work. Through college and early adulthood, I fell in love with seeing the world and, more specifically, learning Spanish and traveling to Latin America. I went on service learning trips to Mexico and Nicaragua and later studied abroad in Peru. This passion and my desire to work in a humanitarian profession eventually led me to work with refugees and migrant victims of trafficking and later learn about unaccompanied immigrant children.

Julia (first left) and her team at the most recent HSPRS conference in Florida

As I reflect on my journey, I realize that my personal experiences were the true foundation of my work all along. The training that resonated so deeply with me and my work at CWS has become part of my healing journey. The feelings of shame have slowly dissipated as I began to understand how children with multiple caregivers struggle to attach to new ones and that sibling separation is, in fact, a traumatic experience. I started to understand my struggles as a result of my environment and have slowly learned to love and accept myself and my experiences as a unique part of me. I realized that children often struggle to adapt to the normalcy and structure of their new families, and I released many emotional burdens and expectations that I felt to be anyone other than me. Under the Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) framework that categorizes childhood experiences that may cause trauma, I have eight of the 10. I carry them on me as battle scars, showing that the journey of overcoming truly is possible with resilience and the proper support. 

Overall, I have come to understand that my struggles are a common experience for many children who face trauma, regardless of nationality, creed or immigration status. On many occasions, my personal experiences have given me unique insight into and understanding of situations that I have dealt with while working at CWS. In the HS/PRS program, we serve many children who have suffered abandonment, abuse, trafficking, and neglect in their home countries, on their journeys, or after arrival to the United States. We have managed cases of children who have had to live with multiple non-parental caregivers and who struggle to adapt to their new home environments. Most are adolescents trying to find their way as soon-to-be young adults in a new country and culture. For some, this may result in mental health challenges that our staff hopes to address with our services and the partnerships that we have in the community. 

On a spiritual level, I have come to understand that God always has a unique way of bringing us back to ourselves and turning our pain into purpose. And while my story only shares pieces of some of the stories of the children we serve in our program, it is this sense of meaning that drives me to support unaccompanied children. 

Julia Poppell is the Senior Officer for Client Services, Children’s Services with Church World Service. 

In our Home Study and Post Release Services program, CWS and our network of providers nationwide are working with unaccompanied children and their sponsors to ensure safe placements, support the children’s well-being, and help them achieve long-term goals through tailored action plans and ongoing guidance. Learn more here.